The Challenge of Incongruence

by Dr. Steve Taubman


Lots of network marketers—I dare say most—suffer from a disease called incongruence.

Incongruence happens when your behavior doesn't match your beliefs...and it shows. Here are the symptoms.

  • You feel "funny" or slightly uncomfortable approaching a prospect.
  • You're "in your head" while talking to them, trying to work out what to say next.
  • You fear that you're being inauthentic in social situations, as if you have a secret agenda.
  • You procrastinate about taking the actions you know would build your business.
  • Despite your success, you're just not happy, joyful, optimistic, or relaxed.

If this diagnosis fits you, and you've been forcing yourself to act in spite of those feelings, you're not alone. In fact, this is a huge issue for over 90 percent of beginning network marketers.

The problem is that most of us have been programmed to believe things like:

  • Talking about my business is pushy.
  • I'm just an annoyance to others.
  • I need to trick people into doing business with me.
  • Network marketing is a scam.
  • If I talk about my business, people won't like me.

Sometimes, just powering through your incongruence and producing results will begin to erode the negative beliefs that create your discomfort. There's something to be said for bold action and for stretching yourself beyond your comfort zone.

However, continued action in spite of discomfort can make you shallow and empty, leaving you with nothing but the illusion of happiness. You've seen those sales people with the painted-on smile and the irritating, affected enthusiasm; the ones who don't even realize they're being phony. You don't want to be one of them.

In my work, there's nothing more important than discovering the joy and prosperity that comes from truly being yourself. The rewards are greater, the risks are fewer, and ultimately, the results are in alignment with what you really want.

So, how do you shed layers of limiting beliefs and find the path towards a joyful and congruent business, while staying conscious and true to yourself?

I've found that there are seven key steps you need to take. I've noticed that not everybody is willing to take those steps, because most people would rather avoid discomfort, and take the path that leads to shallowness and phoniness. They don't realize, until it's too late, that they've journeyed down a dangerous road.

If you want to achieve joy, prosperity, and balance in your business and your life, these are the steps you need to take:

  1. Learn how to spot negative beliefs based on your emotions in the moment.
  2. Start keeping a journal of those emotions and the beliefs that create them.
  3. Sit in quiet contemplation, asking yourself where those beliefs come from.
  4. Write yourself a new "inner script" describing the beliefs that would empower you.
  5. Record yourself reading the new script onto your smartphone or other recording device.
  6. Listen to the new script three times daily while in the most relaxed state you can achieve.
  7. Commit to speaking from the heart whenever you're dealing with others, openly admitting even your fear and discomfort.

Practicing the discipline of being honest with yourself and others will erode any incongruence. As long as you recognize that you're a worthy and admirable human being, committed to living a life of integrity, you can rise above the negative programming that whispers in your ear and creates separating emotions.

Do the inner work diligently, and you'll find that most if not all the voices in your head that are stopping your success will lose their power and be replaced by thoughts and feelings that magnetize prosperity into your life!

Join me in creating your own path to inner congruence. You'll learn how to create joy, prosperity, humor, and courage in your business...and in your life!


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