A common question network marketer leaders hear from new team members is, “How do you get my spouse on board with my network marketing dreams?”
Imagine you’re a young mom and just found a business you can start part time which could be the answer to your problems (feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and financially strapped…).
A friend of yours is doing it. She’s making it work. You feel excited about your future for the first time in years – and you took the plunge and enrolled with a network marketing company.
Your husband, your partner, the father of your children… wasn’t pleased. And he’s been on your case ever since. Little criticisms, rolling his eyes at your big ideas. He seems embarrassed and annoyed. And it’s starting to grate on you.
How can he be so negative? He won’t even open up and LOOK at this business and see what you’re excited about. Without his support you’re starting to feel you may not be able to manage this…
What are you going to do?
This is such a common scenario. Not just in network marketing, but it can happen with any side business a mom sets up. Butting heads about it and flaring up at each other in front of the kids is not going to solve anything…
There are hundreds and hundreds of women who have built successful networks around their negative spouse (and that spouse is plenty willing to sincerely admit he was wrong, now the money is rolling in and he’s been able to “fire his boss”).Hundreds of women have built successful networks around their negative spouse Click To Tweet
How can you, like those successful women, handle your negative spouse?
1- Understand your husband is probably acting out of FEAR.
He’s afraid of the changes you’re making, he’s afraid of this big unknown THING that is your business. Network marketing often has a bad reputation because a lot of people do it poorly. Try and see his behavior as fear-based. It will change how you respond to what he’s doing. Show him you are still on his side – don’t get all angry and defensive. Try and hear him out. Have compassion – he is being unsupportive because he doesn’t like the change that’s happening?
2- Explain you are committed to this.
Be sincere. Let him know you love him, but this is something you have to do for your own sanity. Make light of it – ask him to give you a year of his support so you can “prove him wrong.” What’s the worst that can happen? He gets to laugh at you and say “I told you so.” What’s the best that can happen at the end of that year? YOU get to say “I told you so” and work out how best to take your business to the next level, now that you proved it can make steady, even if still modest, income.
3- Find examples of successful women in your company who have achieved the kind of goals you have set.
See if any of them have a negative spouse story. It can be very compelling to relay that in a respectful way to your husband. It will get him thinking about what he, and your family, stand to lose if he makes this project difficult for you. An excellent way to do this is to leave magazines with these kind of stories laying around… Even success stories from other companies can make compelling reading for a negative spouse.
(Editor’s Note : Networking Times provides an endless stream of such inspiring stories!)Success stories can make compelling reading for a negative spouse. Click To Tweet
4- Tell him you’d like him to look at your presentation about this company.
Ask him to meet your sponsor, because you want to hear an expert answer his questions. Let him know it will help with your own knowledge. It would kill two birds with one stone – helping him know what it’s really about, and fast tracking your training as you hear good, meaty questions being answered. Just as with prospecting, you can’t force your husband to look at this information. You have to respect his decision. But your own commitment, and your willingness to let him come to the table (or not) on his own is a powerful and attractive way to promote your business.
5- Agree on a reward for each family member, or for the family as a whole, when you reach a specific target.
Have you guys always wanted a holiday? That can be a great reward and doesn’t have to cost the earth. Maybe a trip to the movies? Or a meal out for your husband and you – or a weekend get-away? Does he need a new car? As you reach these goals, keep setting new ones. They’re very motivating and make tangible the reason for the sacrifices (time apart and a tight budget).
I know I said 5, but here’s a BONUS: Make a timetable.
Have clarity about family time and don’t encroach on it. Make time to share with your husband and treat it as priceless. As you build your business around your existing commitments, you’re going to get very busy. Plan for that. Prepare for that.
Having a negative spouse is one of those obstacles that can seem insurmountable as you start out on your network marketing journey. Remember many hundreds of other women have climbed over this obstacle and achieved their goals. They released their jobs, and with time, money, and personal development on their side, they continued to got back to growing meaningful relationships with their children, their partners and themselves.
It is absolutely worth it – and YOU can do it!
If you’ve already handled a negative spouse and become successful in your network please leave a comment below and tell readers your experience and your best tip!
Bonus Video: Watch the trailer for Helen Jamieson’s book The Networker.
Helen Jamieson is the author of The Networker, a novel created from experiences on the road to creating a lucrative network marketing business. The book is a fable, a novel, about Sally – a feisty mother of two young children who is exhausted by her job, her lack of money and her negative spouse! The story follows her into, under and around those obstacles on her quest to take back control of her life using network marketing.